St. Anthony

Note from the editor

Time is a fickle thing. While the hands of the clock carefully glide on and the date dial clicks each day, marking a new start, the seasons change just as quickly. We have powered through winter and spring, being rewarded now by the sweet C Minor chord ringing from the television set every Sunday afternoon.

Firstly, I must apologize for my shortcomings as the editor of the newsletter. I have neither produced a consistent product nor managed to write the initial pre-draft piece I intended—perhaps I am the Cincinnati Bengals of fantasy newsletters (a slow starter). Nonetheless, I may be the league's only hope to produce a finished product. The rest of you yahoos are either chasing girls, having girls, playing slow pitch with Kyle, or spending so much time in Michigan that even Kid Rock is jealous.

Several weeks ago, my wife and I spent the weekend in Boston. It is a lovely city with beautiful sights, great food, and even better people. There is something special about the New England charm of these folks—the real Mark Wahlberg type. While we initially booked the trip with the intention of just seeing the big historical sites and catching a game at Fenway Park, we soon found ourselves in the North End of Boston nearly every night. This section of town, widely known as "Little Italy," has a lot in common with the real Italy (though I have never been to Italy myself). Little Italy hosts the famous St. Anthony's feast toward the end of each summer. This feast honors the "Saint of Lost Things" (someone Connor should consider getting to know, given his track record in the league) and is a full weekend celebration of faith, culture, and community. The highlight of this event is the procession, where a statue of St. Anthony is paraded through the streets. As I stood on the curb of the famous Mike's Pastry, I couldn't help but admire the devotion of everyone involved in the parade. The following picture was snapped during my moment of reflection. If you look closely, you just might see yourself in this photo...

Sam - The Commisioner

The life of St. Anthony (Saint of Lost Things) closely mirrors that of our dear commissioner. Born to a wealthy family in 1195, he spent his life saving others in miraculous ways. Pretty fitting comparison for a guy that is going to be a doctor, and was raised by a Harvard lawyer. Personal life aside, this particular statue is where Sam fits into our fantasy football story. Each year we send money in hopes that he helps us find lost things. Whether that be joy, fulfillment, pain, or financial freedom - we throw Venmo payments at him each year hoping that he can deliver us.

Isaac - New Guy

Not much to say other than this looks like Isaac.

FUCH YOU

Just a guy that is happy to be here. Whether he wins or loses, he is always up for a good time. He has a great attitude towards the joys and pains of fantasy football. He spends his FAAB like a blue collar worker - gas station snack style

CRAW

Everyone knows his wife runs the team... (or he is getting paid by IBM Watson has to learn what a bad trade is somehow)

Nate

This man is focused, ready, and could be dangerous. The only problem is that his camera is pointed away from the main event.

Connor

This man is holding onto the foundation of this statue like his life depends on it. To him, just making it to the end of the parade route is a success. Probably a guy that likes to run the football. On a different note, if Connor could reccomend his sideline doctor to Tua - he would be back under center for the dolphins this week.

Keaton - Tough Guy

At the end of the day - you are still standing below St. Anthony (2 Time League Champion)

Chubbzz

Looks like a guy who has a tire store in Bountiful - could be him someday.

B Sally

Even during the most important event of the season, this guy clearly has something more important on his phone. Very similar to Sally during a fantasy draft after about the 4th round.

Kyle

This guy probably orders his outfits from China - I wonder if he would be intersted in a shoe order.